Suburban Thesis Statement

Balancing a rude and sarcastic tone in "Suburban", John Ciardi uses superficial characterization, clear imagery, and hyporcritical humor in order to show the reader that in certain situations, people will walk all over one another because it's just not worth having an arguement about.

Naked Lunch Thesis Statement

Shifting from a peaceful to a terrifying lunch in "Naked Lunch", Michael Hollinger uses extreme characterization, sarcastic irony, and intense imagery in order to display to the reader that no one should let their significant other, or ex-significant other, tell them how to live their life.

The Superbowl

            What I don’t get about the Super bowl is how excited EVERYONE gets to watch it. People will go the whole time without watching one game and then the Super bowl comes and they are the biggest fans. They get so happy, it’s just like they want some sort of excuse to paint their faces and get wasted. What better way to do so than the Super bowl, right? I personally didn’t watch the Super bowl. I don’t believe in getting all hyped up for a football game when I don’t even know what the word “sacked” means. I am a sports noob.

Sometimes I see my mom watching the game and she’s screaming some gibberish that I don’t understand and saying all these football term words that make no sense to me. I try to ask her what stuff means and I never get an answer either. She just stares into the TV with eyes aflame and steam coming out her ears when the team does something that she doesn’t like. It’s a whole other language to me. I also didn’t have to watch the Super bowl to know what was going on.

There are like several people posting everyone’s move and score and all their thoughts on the game on face book. Like really people? You’re at a Super bowl party with all your friends and family and every single one of you has a phone or computer within arm’s length to document everything that happens in the game while you’re watching it? IF I WANTED TO WATCH THE GAME I WOULDN’T BE ON FACEBOOK. I went on face book in the first place because I was bored because everyone was too busy at their Super bowl parties to hangout with me.

I also didn’t need to watch the game or go on face book to know the Patriots were losing. My mom was literally having a temper tantrum. She was stomping her feet and yelling like someone was murdering our wiener dog. I tried desperately to leave my house. She was seriously starting to scare me, but guess what everyone was too busy doing?................................................................................................................................

Sincerely,

The girl who wants nothing to do with the Super bowl.